Thursday, February 01, 2007

Don't call it a "hoax." Call it your own stupidity.

Boston-ites prove, yet again (see: Red Sox), that they are the second most self-centered (thank you New York) group of douchebags out there.

Don't call it a "hoax" when its really just your own stupidity.

Boston Publicity Ploy Leads To 2 Arrests
Electronic Devices Planted Around City A Backfired Marketing Ploy By Cartoon Network

(CBS News) BOSTON Several illuminated electronic devices planted at bridges and other spots in Boston threw a scare into the city Wednesday in what turned out to be a publicity campaign for a late-night cable cartoon. Most of the devices depict a character giving the finger.

Peter Berdovsky, 27, of Arlington, and Sean Stevens, 28, of Charlestown, were each charged Wednesday night with one count of placing a hoax device and one count of disorderly conduct, state Attorney General Martha Coakley said. The two men worked together to place the devices, Coakley said in a news release announcing Stevens' arrest.

Highways, bridges and a section of the Charles River were shut down and bomb squads were sent in before authorities declared the devices were harmless.
Are you fist-fucking me? Get the F out. You guys saw something that amounted to a Lite-Brite and you all freaked out and called the bomb squad?
Turner Broadcasting, a division of Time Warner Inc. and parent of Cartoon Network, said the devices were part of a promotion for the TV show "Aqua Teen Hunger Force," a surreal series about a talking milkshake, a box of fries and a meatball.
They make it seem so silly. They do that show no justice.
Authorities are investigating whether Turner and any other companies should be criminally charged, Coakley said.
Okay, now I HAVE see it all.
Berdovsky and Stevens were scheduled to be arraigned Thursday in Charlestown District Court, Coakley said.

"We're not going to let this go without looking at the further roots of how this happened to cause the panic in this city," Coakley said at a news conference.
I'll tell you how. Your city is filled with a bunch of self-centered IDIOTS!!! Seriously, what a bunch of trigger happy pussies.

Seriously. You want to know the casue? Bostonians.
Those conducting the campaign should have known the devices could cause panic because they were placed in sensitive areas, she said. Turner did not notify officials of the publicity campaign until around 5 p.m., nearly four hours after the first calls came in about the devices, she and others said.
You mean, other than than the fact that they are made up of little LCD lights?

Seriously, let's look at one of these things:

WTF did you think it was? And you guys thought I was kidding when I said it was nothing more than a Lite-Brite.

I mean, seriously, who thought these were bombs? When the hell have "The Teorrists" decided to draw cartoon pictures on shit they were going to blow up? Honestly...

The law under which the two men were charged allows the state to pursue restitution. Mayor Thomas Menino said the security scare may have cost the city more than $500,000.

At least 14 of the devices were found, and at least 24 more are still around the city, officials said.

"The packages in question are magnetic lights that pose no danger," Turner said in a statement.
Okay, let's look at the law involved then...

Mass 226, 102A1/2 - (a) Whoever ... uses or places or causes another to knowingly or unknowingly possess, transport, use or place any hoax device ... with the intent to cause anxiety, unrest, fear or personal discomfort to any person or group of persons shall be punished by imprisonment in a house of correction ....

(b) For the purposes of this section, the term “hoax device” shall mean any device that would cause a person reasonably to believe that such device is an infernal machine. For the purposes of this section, the term “infernal machine” shall mean any device for endangering life or doing unusual damage to property, or both, by fire or explosion, whether or not contrived to ignite or explode automatically....

Okay, first, they obviously didn't have the intent to "cause anxiety, unrest, fear or personal discomfort. This is clearly an advertisement deal.

Second, and look at this one closely Boston, a "hoax device" means one that would cause "a person REASONABLY to believe that such device is an infernal machine." You CANNOT possibly try to tell me that this was "reasonable" believed to be a bomb. I'm sorry, it just can't happen.

Maybe I'm being too hard on Boston. I mean, maybe the pictures don't do it justice. I wonder if other cities would react the same way....
It said the devices have been in place for two to three weeks in 10 cities: Boston; New York; Los Angeles; Chicago; Atlanta; Seattle; Portland, Ore.; Austin, Texas; San Francisco; and Philadelphia.
Nope. Guess Boston is the only one filled with dipshits.
"We regret that they were mistakenly thought to pose any danger," the company said. As soon as the company realized the problem, it said, law enforcement officials were told of their locations in all 10 cities.
That conversation went like this...

Police: Hello, XXXX city police. How can I help you?

Company: Yeah, just wanted to tell you that those Lite-Brite things aren't bombs.

Police: Umm....okay....does you Mom know your calling?
The marketing firm that put them up, Interference Inc., has been ordered to remove them immediately, said Phil Kent, Turner chairman.

"We apologize to the citizens of Boston that part of a marketing campaign was mistaken for a public danger," Kent said. "We appreciate the gravity of this situation and, like any responsible company would, are putting all necessary resources toward understanding the facts surrounding it as quickly as possible."
Interference Inc. had no immediate comment. A woman who answered the phone at the New York-based firm's offices Wednesday afternoon said the firm's CEO was out of town and would not be able to comment until Thursday.

There were no reports from police Wednesday of residents in the other nine cities spotting similar devices.
Thank you. Take that Boston.
Homeland Security Department spokesman Russ Knocke praised Boston authorities for sharing their knowledge quickly with Washington officials and the public.

"Hoaxes are a tremendous burden on local law enforcement and counter-terrorism resources and there's absolutely no place for them in a post-9/11 world," Knocke said.
IT WASN'T A FLIPPIN' HOAX!!!! Look up the definition and then get back to me.

Seriously, how do you people manage to breathe?
Authorities said some of the objects looked like circuit boards or had wires hanging from them. The first device was found at a subway and bus station underneath Interstate 93, forcing the shutdown of the station and the highway.

Later, police said four calls, all around 1 p.m., reported devices at the Boston University Bridge, which spans the Charles River, and at a Boston street corner. A similar device was found Wednesday evening just north of Fenway Park, police spokesman Eddy Chrispin said. The scare caused some subway service to be suspended and closed a road.

Wanda Higgins, a 47-year-old Weymouth resident and a nurse at Massachusetts General Hospital, heard about the threat as she watched television news coverage while preparing to leave work at 4 p.m.

"I saw the bomb squad guys carrying a paper bag with their bare hands," Higgins said. "I knew it couldn't be too serious."

Messages seeking additional comment from the Atlanta-based Cartoon Network were left with several publicists.

"Aqua Teen Hunger Force" is a cartoon with a cultish following that airs as part of the Adult Swim late-night block of programs for adults on the Cartoon Network. A feature length film based on the show is slated for release March 23.

The cartoon also includes two trouble-making, 1980s-graphic-like characters called "mooninites," named Ignignokt and Err -- who were pictured on the suspicious devices. They are known for making the obscene hand gesture depicted on the devices.

Hey Boston...


Blogger Jingdood said...

Holly crap.

What a bunch of dipshi$$.

10:07 PM  
Blogger Prof. Schwarzenegger said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

11:40 AM  
Blogger Prof. Schwarzenegger said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

11:42 AM  
Blogger Prof. Schwarzenegger said...

Please note, swearing is allowed on this page.

You can call them dipshits.

The only words that need a dollar sign in them are "$t. Thomas."

11:44 AM  

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